After you bury your husband, for a long long time, maybe longer, you will feel like crap. But later than sooner, you will be okay. You will get through. Here are 7 essential tips to guide you:

1. Comb your hair, brush your teeth, and for goodness sakes, take out the trash. If there are two things that will make you feel worse, it is a bad hair day and a parade of creepy crawly things marching across your kitchen floor.

2. Drink water. No, you will not feel hungry. And, it is okay to skip a meal, or two, or three. But, drink water. Keep hydrated. It is important to keep your kidneys flush.

3. Got children? Feed them. Do not forget! Force yourself. Even if it is cold cereal and milk for supper, it is okay. And for Heaven’s sake, sit with them, and put on a happy face when you do. Remember, they are grieving, too.

4. Feed kitty. Walk doggy. And, yes. Empty the cat box! Need I say more?

5. Pay your utility bill. Pay your rent/mortgage, before you go to bed and turn out the light. Your other bills can wait. And, gracious, if there is a problem with paying future bills, contact the lender, the keeper of the fire, and explain the chain of events leading up to your telephone call. Assure them you will not forget. Do not be surprised how helpful people will become as soon as you tell them what is going on.

6. Take a nap. For crying out loud, worrying and burying a man is a lot of stress. It will tax your energy even on a good day. So be sure to schedule a time. Then lay down, lady, take a load off your feet, get some rest.

7. Got paper? Got pen? Next time you dash out the door for that quart of milk and bag of kitty litter, pick up a cheap spiral notebook and fast writing pen. These are for your thoughts, and the list of items you need to remember to do. Helping your brain wrap itself around what has happened in your life will get you through the grief process. Because, lump it or like it, after the death of a spouse, life goes on.

If you follow my 7 essential tips outlined above, you will be one baby step closer to getting on with the best of your life.

You now have permission to visit Linda Della Donna’s blog, http://www.griefcase.blogspot.net and email her at littleredmailbox.com to request your copy of her free ebook, “Treasury of Quotations — For Widows Only.”

Tags: alone, bury, cope, death, depressed, dying, funeral, grief, husband, miss, permission, sad, sadness, sorrow, widow

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