(1) Take time off - Take a vacation or a long weekend. During the work day, take a short break to stretch. Walk, breathe slowly, and take a day off and go to the beach, and relax.

(2) Manage your time - Set realistic goals and deadlines. Plan projects accordingly. Do “must do” tasks first. Schedule difficult tasks for the time of day when you are most productive. Tackle easy tasks when you feel low on energy or motivation.

(3) Set limits - When necessary, learn to say “no” in a friendly, but firm manner.

Anger, is a strong feeling that is hidden deep deep deep under several layers of skin and often unleashed inappropriately. Actually some of us are able to control this beast more easily than others. They do not get triggered as easily and know how to deal with it. Why? Because they can communicate what is important to them.

So for the rest of us; why is it so silent and vicious? Why does it emerge unexpectedly? Personally I did not know I could become so angry so fast. I really thought I was not an angry person.

Do you ever find yourself getting more and more angry and frustrated while trying to explain what is bothering you? Perhaps you feel like others are not really listening to you or trying to understand things from your perspective. In such circumstances, you may end up raising your voice or becoming verbally or even physically abusive. Unfortunately, responding in this manner usually decreases your chances of being listened to with empathy and compassion.

Anyone who has seen the Gieco insurance advertisement, featuring the now famous cavemen, will agree with me that they need anger management. These cavemen have never had an anger outburst so the question may be: how could one say that they need anger management? The answer is related to the comprehensive scope of the Anderson and Anderson anger management model which focuses on not only anger management but communications skills, emotional intelligence and stress management.

Eight tips to deal with explosive persons who confront you: defusing potentially dangerous situations

1. Do not respond in kind. Hostility often begets more hostility.

Respond instead with a non-hostile message to defuse people who are behaving in a hostile manner toward you. The classic example of this is in when simple inconsiderate driving or even aggressive driving suddenly escalates into road rage due to two drivers ratcheting up hostility in response to the other’s hostile acts, words, or gestures. Please remember that in these and other hostile situations, you contribute somewhat to the outcome by your decision to return hostility or not.

The first step to controlling anger is understanding it. While anger and anger management are complex topics, this article will help you by providing some basic information and methods that will make your anger that much more manageable.

What is anger

First of all, don’t make yourself bad for having anger. Anger in itself is nothing wrong. Anger is wrong only if you hold it in, or if you express it in an unhealthy way. This is where anger management comes in - what is healthy and what is unhealthy?

In a previous article, George Anderson discussed emotional intelligence as a critical factor in anger management interventions. I want to suggest that true anger management cannot take place without emotional intelligence. Anger is a secondary emotion and is therefore driven by other emotions. Understanding the emotions that drive our anger is critical in their management.

True anger management demands that we recognize our emotions and consciously decide our actions. Emotions are fascinating because they are a way of communicating with the world. They give us clues about what we love, cherish and the things that we less regard for. Wrapped up in literally thousands of emotions is an emotional language that connects with the world in meaningful ways. Who wants to be like the character Data on Star Trek–an emotionless being who lives only in the realm of logic? I certainly don’t.

It is how you deal with failure that really makes you a success. Life has many events, pleasant and bitter, but they should be faced with a positive attitude and effective anger management techniques can give you the courage you need.

We often have stages , points in life, where we face rejection and are told ‘no’. Rejection is a normal process and should be accepted as such. Some people cannot accept rejections and may even react badly.

GAIN CONTROL OF YOUR ANGER NOW WITH THESE STEPS:

1. Breathe deep and long breaths. Be sure to open your belly and breathe deep into your abdomen. You may not know it, but when you’re angry you’re panicking. This will help you to calm down.

2. Walk outside and look at the sky while you’re doing your deep breathing. This will help you to put things in perspective, and it can have a soothing effect.

3. Do some stretches. When you’re angry your body gets tense and rigid. The stretching will open up some of the tight areas of your body and get more oxygen flowing to your brain and help you clear your thoughts.

Emotional intelligence: A survival mechanism

A few days ago I asked my assistant to catalogue a list of 200 contrasting positive and negative feeling words from a list of a few thousand feeling words. Amazingly my assistant completed this task in less than three hours but more amazingly she made an observation that sparked the question that caused me to write this article. She asked why in a list of a few thousand feeling words was it noticeable that there were more negative words than positive. This question got me thinking.