positive thinking is a mind frame which expects happiness, joy, health and a successful outcome of every situation. When this belief is so powerful, this expectation is always reached by that individual. With positive thinking many people fear this because they dont want to build themselves up for a big win, only to find that they sink to a greater low, when they lose. This attitude may be influenced by past experience, where a person may have taken many knocks in their lifetime i.e. lose of job, failed relationships or unsuccessful marriages. Therefore, these people have the tendency to always fear the worst outcome of every situation. Every time this negative cycle is reinforced, expectations are lowered and negative outcomes are generated. But we can reverse negative thinking by doing the following;

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Did you disappoint your parents when you failed your grades? Did they say hurtful things in the heat of the moment that have stayed in your head? Quite often, negative thinking results from messages we received when we were young. Were you bullied at school? Even a friend's childish throwaway comment can lead to years of negative thinking when these thoughts become stored in your subconscious.

Are you unemployed? Do you have a disability? Are you gay? Prejudice and stigma can have a devastating effect on your confidence. The media are often to blame for self-doubt and feelings of worthlessness. The size zero brigade and perfect images of movie icons and rock stars can leave anyone feeling inadequate.

Once learnt, you may repeat these messages endlessly to yourself until they become beliefs, particularly when life is difficult for one reason or another.

Being unorganized has a negative effect on the self-esteem of a lot of people. It is able to make an underlying feeling of issues being out of control, priorities not being centered on and a fault-finding sense of ineffective fulfill. It is subtly and you may not observe it, but disarrangement is something that has really a worrying undertone.

On the other hand, becoming organized commits you a program, a system of rules to work from and usages that appreciate your life instead unscramble it. A peaceful surround is really helpful for the business life of someone, the family life and personal life. Your plans are not messy, you become less cranky and you find your time is applied very well. You will get a good sense of achievement and not a sense of dreadful that is part of your plans.

The moment you decide to take dominion over what happens to you
internally (regardless of the gunk and funk that can go on during a day)
you step into your rightful place as the Mayor of You-ville. The instant
you take office, you step up to the podium of your self-esteem and
personal power. Hey, when I say personal power, I’m not talking about
strutting through your life like a bad reality TV show diva. I’m talking
about simply claiming the capacity that is already yours.

Think about what it means to be the Mayor of You-ville. You are able
to speak up and set clear, healthy boundaries. (Even at work. Even with
your kids. Even with your in-laws.) You are able to keep your cool with
that creep from accounting. You are able to ask for what you want because
what the heck, you’re the Mayor. Take a moment and drink it in. Connect
with what being in charge of you feels like inside your skin. Most people
feel a sense of expansiveness or serenity. What about you?

Are you happy with yourself – with who you are and what you are doing? If you want high self esteem this is very important. Here’s what you need to be happy with yourself:

a) Don’t compete with others. Life is not a race. Set your own standards and try to reach them, don’t be scared to fail and accept your own limitations. Competing with others will drain you and will take away your self esteem because there will always be someone better than you. Decide on your path and stick to it.

b) Understand yourself. Know your strengths and weaknesses. Use your skills and do your best. You will find satisfaction when you are doing what you are good at and when you accept your weaknesses. Chances are you will also be more successful this way. Try to improve yourself but don’t waste effort and time on those things which are not for you. Accept your best as good enough.

Self esteem starts right from childhood and shaped through our views of the world and life itself. Self esteem is about understanding and recognizing who we are and to live in perfect harmony with ourselves without having the need to consistently seek approval from others.

All success can be essentially boils down to one’s self esteem. A person with poor self esteem, who’s consistently concern on how others looked at him, would probably lead an unproductive life. Hence, raising one’s self esteem is extremely important because it determines how one will react to events and responses and ultimately the decisions he make in life.

Yet, most people are unaware of this and unconsciously allow their self esteem to be affected the media, limiting beliefs, family, friends and peers and a host of other factors.

An important aspect of being a creator of your reality is to be in control of your reality at all times. When you are not being in control of your reality, other forces are pulling you in all directions, causing you to feel out of control, lost and confused about what is going on. You stay in control by knowing what it is that you want and acting accordingly, and not to the wishes and influences of the people and environment around you. Being in control also makes you attractive to others because you’re powerful.

It is a very different situation when you are in a group as compared to when you are alone. When you are in a group, the many different intentions and thoughts of people are pulling you in many different directions all at the same time. Therefore to be in control, you have to stay centered and act according to your own mind. You do not have to follow along with the activities of the group no matter who is leading if it is not your wish. You are not here to please men but to please God which is your true inner self.

There are many people that will try to teach you how to build your self esteem. But not everyone knows how to really build self esteem. When a person has great self esteem, he is able to participate more actively in life. His life becomes richer, and he will find his relationships with the people he loves will improve. Here are some tangible ways that you can use to build
your self esteem:

1. Visualize yourself taking a more active role in your life drama. This means that you will see yourself being less shy and introverted, participating more in family, work or school, and community activities. Take note this does not mean being aggressive – it just means you will try to play more of a part in your immediate environment.

When we’re depressed, usually we feel we aren’t accomplishing much. We may be making an effort, but we have a tendency to give up easily. Unfortunately, after a time we start to doubt we can count on ourselves to do what we say, or we may become reluctant to agree to meet with anyone or promise to do anything because we don’t know how we’ll feel when the time comes. This usually spirals downward because the more often we break a promise or avoid one, the more that seems to prove to us that we aren’t reliable.

So how can we change this? How can we become reliable again, not just to others, but more importantly, prove to ourselves we will do what we intend? Because if we can’t count on ourselves even to go to an appointment, how can we believe we can accomplish our dreams? We can’t. And that would depress anyone. But if instead you practice making promises to yourself and keeping them, you can gradually rebuild confidence in yourself.